Healthy Ways to Reduce Stress #1: Learn to say "no"

An impending deadline at work. Getting the kids to school on time in the morning. Paying all the bills on time. Making sure dinner is perfect for your spouse's birthday. All of these things, and so much more, add stress to our every day lives. Unfortunately, the stressors won't disappear, but you can control how you act in response to them. In fact, the simple realization that you're in control of your life is the foundation of stress management.

Managing stress is about taking charge: taking charge of your thoughts, emotions, schedule and the way you deal with your problems. The ultimate goal is a balanced life, with time for work, relationships, relaxation and fun - plus the ability to hold up under pressure and meet your challenges head on.

This week, the blog will feature 5 different ways that you can reduce stress in your life. While all these methods have been proven effective, the most important is to find out what works for YOU. Give us your feedback this week by posting a comment. Share with others how you reduce stress in your life! And by posting a comment, you can enter for your chance to win this week's giveaway: an aromatherapy bath set!

Healthy Ways to Reduce Stress #1: Learn to say "no"

We all have priorities. We know we need to organize our time and resources to complete work assignments and meet family and social obligations. Sometimes this means taking a pass on a volunteer or social commitment. You can't be all things to all people all the time! Sometimes you just have to say, "No, not this time, but feel free to keep me in mind for the future."

Consider these 3 reason for saying "no":

1. Saying "no" isn't necessarily selfish: When you say no to a new commitment, you are honoring your existing obligations and ensuring that you'll be able to devote quality time to them.
2. Saying "no" can allow you to try new things: Just because you have always helped plan the company holiday celebrations doesn't mean that you have to do it forever. Saying no will give you time to pursue other interests.
3. Always saying "yes" isn't healthy: When you are overcommitted and under too much stress, you are more likely to feel run down and get sick.

So how do you determine when you should say "no"?

1. Focus on what matters the most: Examine your current obligations and overall priorities before making any new commitments. Ask yourself if the new commitment is important to you. If it's something you feel strongly about, then by all means do it. If not, take a pass.
2. Weigh the pros and cons: Is the new commitment a long or short-term activity? Don't say "yes" if it will mean months of added stress. Instead, look for other short-term ways to pitch in, such as helping with just one aspect of the activity. For example, instead of being in charge of the school fundraising committee for the entire year, say that you will be in charge of the spring bake sale.
3. Take guilt out of the equation: Don't agree to a request you would rather decline because of feelings of guilt or obligation. Doing so will likely lead to additional stress and resentment.
4. Sleep on it: Always take time to think about someones request and how it fits in with your future commitments.

And if you get to the point where you realize you just have to say "no," keep the following in mind:

• The word "no" has power, but don't be afraid to use it. Be careful about using less-impactful phrases, such as "I'm not sure" or "I don't think I can right now." These can be interpreted to mean that you might say yes later.
• Be brief by avoiding elaborate justifications or explanations. Simply state your reason for refusing, but don't go on and on about it.
• Don't fabricate reasons to get out of an obligations. The truth is always the best way to turn a commitment down, whether it is a friend, family member or coworker.
• Make sure to still be respectful by complimenting the group's effort, which shows that you still respect what they're trying to accomplish.

**Don't forget to post a comment on today's post for your chance to win this week's giveaway: a luxury aromatherapy set!**